Because it’s February (the month of love) and my 5 year anniversary with my boyfriend is coming up, I’ve been thinking about how we survived 3 years being long distance from Florida to New York. On average I would say we were able to see each other every 3 to 4 months, with the longest time not seeing each other in person being over 6 months. LDRs are hard but definitely worth it in the end! Long Distance ended 2 years ago for us, but I want to make this blog post for anyone who is currently going through what we did.
This is a list of everything Collin and I did to make the 3 years more bearable.
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1. Play Games
I am thankful we live in a time where there’s an endless amount of online games to play. We both love games and quizzes so this was a big part of our LDR quality time. A lot of these games don’t have to be played at the same time so we didn’t have to stop everything we were doing to play with each other.
Our favorite game apps for our phones were QuizUp and Words with Friends. We also liked to play online chess and other games at sporcle.com.
2. FaceTime Dates
This one is pretty obvious, but if you are a very busy person this could be hard. I was in college working a part time job and trying to have a social life and Collin was very busy with a new full time job in a new city, so it was hard to FaceTime each other a lot. We would usually plan a date at least once a week. You should treat this as a real date- get dressed up, watch a movie together, etc. Have fun with it!
3. Have Something to Look Forward too
As I mentioned earlier, we were only able to see each other every 3 or 4 months and looking forward to the next time I knew we would be together helped me get through those long periods of time. Plan out your vacations and visits so you never have the feeling of not knowing when you can see each other again.
4. Make Each Other Things
I’m not an artist and I never drew or painted anything until I started making things for Collin. I’ve painted so many pictures, made him things, and even painted/decorated an entire water cooler! Painting and drawing was like therapy when I was missing him – and he loved decorating his room with all my homemade art!
Here are some of the random things I made:
This is my favorite picture I’ve ever painted! Collin was a red panda in New York City and I was a sloth in Tallahassee.
5. Write Letters
Sure, you can text each other all day long, but its so much more fun to receive a letter in the mail! Writing out what you’re thinking / feeling can be a helpful way to get out some emotions.
6. Surprise Them with a Thoughtful Gift (or Food!)
If you’re out and see something that reminds you of your significant other, buy it and send it to them to give them a nice little surprise! One of my favorite things Collin would do is get my favorite meals or desserts delivered to my apartment Via Grubhub.
7. Watch a TV Series Together
and only watch it at the same time- no going ahead!! You can also read a book or watch a movie at the same time. This is a way to spend quality time together even when you’re apart, plus it will give you more to talk about at the end of each show / chapter / movie.
8. Buy Something Specifically Made for LDRs
9. Have an End in Sight
I think it’s important to know that one day you won’t have to be long distance. For me, I didn’t know the exact date but I knew when I graduated college I would apply to airlines that had a New York City base. Are either of you willing to relocate? Do you want to live in the same location? These are important questions!
10. View Your LDR Experience as a Positive Thing
View your time apart as a time for self-growth, instead of dwelling on the negatives and how much you miss them. If you can make it through long distance, your relationship can pretty much survive anything. You will both grow individually in your time apart. You will become more independent and learn how to trust each other more. For me, long distance was definitely a blessing in disguise. I travel for work and a lot of couples wouldn’t be able to spend 3 to 4 days a week apart, but this is easy for us because we are used to only being able to be together a couple weeks every 4 months. Take this time to grow and reflect on yourself.